Two days ago,  I had eyelid surgery.  In the operating room the surgeon told me I would be glamorous now. Actually, I did the surgery, not for cosmetic reasons, but,  to improve my field of vision. The insurance company considered it a medical procedure.

Right now, I am far from “glamorous.” I look as if I have been beaten around the eyes and, on top of that, have a dreadful hangover. At night when I wear the eye shields, I look like a creature from outer space.  Here’s hoping the current condition of my eyes is temporary and this is just a transitional period.

I confess to some anxiety about the actual surgery itself. Fortunately, my fears did not materialize and that went well.  At some point, I gave myself over into the hands of the competent medical staff and that felt good. I did not know enough to worry about the after-effects.

This is all leading me to think about change. Is it ever without a difficult period of transition? Is that why we dislike change so much?  Of course, if one just “goes with the flow” some change inevitably comes anyway. Then there is the change that we actually choose, whether its something on a personal level, or in a familial or public arena. And sometimes, change is a chosen reaction to change that is not in our control.

Going through this minor transition time, following a personal decision to have elective surgery, puts me once again in touch with how difficult, even necessary or desired change is. There is always the getting from here to there.

How we handle transitions matters. These are times of reflection, healing, and steering a new course. As someone said to me, a time to gain new clarity. A second chance.

Where is faith in all of this. Faith is present at the moment of decision. Faith helps us makes the best of change when change is inevitable, or make what we hope are good choices when options are ours. During the transition time that follows change, faith and hope need to work together. During these times we are called to be very present even as we keep a hopeful eye toward the future.  (In my case, literally and figuratively.)

Blessings to all those who, on whatever scale, are choosing to seek  better lives. May transitions be times of discovery and recovery, and may faith and hope be steadfast. Most of all, may times of change not be wasted. May we find ways to embrace clarity and  some greater good along the way.

Last night, I reached into the drawer of my nightstand and found a book I had long forgotten was there. The book had belonged to my father-in-law, The Rev. Raymond Kepler. A thin black book with barely legible markings on the outside. I opened it and began to read some of the prayers it contains and was amazed.  Whoever was their author had insights and perspectives that are so relevant to right now.  Prayers recognizing the validity of all religions, prayers asking for hearts to respect onre another’s faith.  Prayers for harmony, justice, and peace.

I turned to the front of the book.  “A Book of Public Prayers” by Harry Emerson Fosdick with an inscription by Dad Kepler from 1961. The Rev. Fosdick was a great preacher;  for a time, a Baptist in a Presbyterian pulpit. It is said that Riverside Church in New York City was built for him. I decided to begin at the beginning of his book and read a prayer each night until I  reached its end. I record the opening words of the first prayer in the book:

“Eternal Spirit, who carest for each of us as if thou hadst none else to care for, and yet, carest for all even as thou carest for each, we turn our hearts to thee. All our thoughts touch but the outskirts of thy ways; our imaginations are but partial pictures of thy truth; our words concerning thee are short plummets dropped into a deep sea. Yet, into thy sanctuary we come with grateful and expectant hearts, because while, we by searching cannot find thee out, thou  by thy searching, canst find us.”

The language is old fashioned but the thought is fresh and meaningful to me. I am touched by the fact that a man of Fosdick’s stature, could be filled with the rightful humility that befits our humanity and yet the strength of spirit to feel cared for by the Eternal Spirit.

Enjoying the warm weather and a few days of reprieve from a hard winter, I was soaking up the sun and reading the morning paper.

I came across an article about hospitals using breast milk from donors other than the child’s mother for premature infants.  They have discovered that premature babies do better in critical ways on  mother’s milk.  I’m glad that they have something that simple that makes a real difference.

But now, a whole industry is growing around the sale of this form of “liquid gold”! The article went on to talk about an evolving industry around mother’s milk, which it turns out is very expensive! Is mother’s milk really essential for full term babies?  I am not questioning the benefit of mother’s milk for new-borns when it is available. But is it really the only healthy option?

When our sons were born, admittedly awhile ago, the going attitude was that our babies could thrive either on breast milk or formula. And they did.  In fact, I was a more relaxed mother with our son who was on formula and he reflected that calm. I do recognize the value of mother’s milk. But, if a mother can’t or couldn’t nurse, or chooses or chose not to nurse for whatever reason, or if a Dad has to feed a baby, it is not the end of the world.  There is no reason to make one’s self crazy. Trust in love. That’s solid gold.

Not everything that is best is essential.  Sometimes, all right is enough, even fine.

A case in the courts of the Presbyterian Church filed against a minister, The Rev. Jean Southard, for performing the marriage of two women, congregants in her church, has finally been resolved at the General Assembly (national and final)level.  The decision exonerates the Rev. Southard,  stating that she was not in disobedience to her ordination vows which call all clergy to honor church law. Massachusetts, in legalizing same sex marriage had opened the door for clergy to officiate at such marriages. They reasoned that since no church interpretation had been made since the establishment of new civil marriage laws in Massachusetts, she was therefore not in violation of church law.

However, the decision states clearly that civil law cannot dictate Presbyterian law and the church’s interpretation of marriage. Right now, they affirmed the fact that marriage is currently interpreted as being between a man and woman in the Book of Order. With this case behind us, Presbyterian Clergy cannot claim to perform same sex marriages as Christian marriages in the church, even where permitted by civil law.

Some of those on the Commission who decided this case, while agreeing with the decision, called upon the church to change its laws to honor the full participation of gay, lesbian, bi-sexual, and transgendered people in the life of the church.

Clearly, the full acceptance by our church of gay marriage will not come through a court case but rather through a change in our Book of Order. The conversation goes on. In states where civil law permits, can Presbyterian clergy perform marriages if they do not claim ecclesiastical authority in so doing?

As a clergy person who has performed many marriages, I find this an interesting question. As a Christian clergy person, whenever I perform a marriage, I make it clear to the couple involved that by asking me to officiate, they are asking a religious agent who believes that God is a party to their covenant. The Divine is involved,  invoked as they enter the Covenant of Marriage. We talk about what this means to them. Can I invoke God’s presence without invoking the name of the church?

As for myself, I see marriage as a covenant into which either heterosexual or homosexual couples ought to be able to enter with all the rights and responsibilities thereof,  hopefully, ultimately, with the blessing of their religious tradition.

Furthermore, marriage has a questionable history when it comes to women’s rights. and men’s financial responsibilities.  It has not been until recent years that marriage has become an institution that has supported equality between spouses. When women are subordinate to men and when men carry more responsibility than they can bear, in its estate, I see this as a violation of God’s will for humanity. The church is being continually called to foster deep and abiding love and well being; we are being called to support just relationship between two people in marriage. Let’s worry about the quality of marriage for partners,  not whether the partners are heterosexual or homosexual..

Happy Valentines Day!

This is a PS ro the story about John’s birthday rolls which, as I said,k were delivered to him and consumed at his party. Except for those that we kept at home for ourselves. We are some for breakfast before going to church. When we came back we found that our dog had helped herself to the restof the rolls. We are not happy with her when she takes things from the kitchen counter. Nor are we happy when we leave things twithin temptations reach. This time, we just had to laugh and admit that she got in on the celebration too and left it at that!  Rolls all around.

Today is our son John’s birthday and I am making crescent rolls. For many people, this would not be a challenge. For me, store bought is good enough and from scratch is too time consumming. But he requested the rolls. At first I said, “no.” Then I remembered that as a child he had grown so used to store bought cakes for his birthday that he came to prefer them. Or so he said. (I was a happy as a working mom who learned to simplify.) It may be time to make it up to him now that I am retired. My husband helped me put my apron on saying that I had not worn it in fifty years. (A slight exaggeration.) As I work the dough, there is a certain satisfaction and …anxiety. I am not a total stranger to this. I’ve done my share of cooking, Some of it is coming back but I am not sure of myself. The shape of the rolls is questionable. I’ll stop now and see if the rolls rise. If not, I did find some on sale at our grocers.

Today was also President Lincoln’s birthday. (Check out the new Lincoln dollar coins.)  I have always enjoyed the fact that our son was born on this day.

I return to the rolls. They turned out okay, in fact, they were good and I actually enjoyed making them. I was even able to substitute whole wheat flour for more than half of the white flour.  John’s wife and daughters put on a party with his friends.  Tomorrow is our celebration with th family.  Much joy and love to John and “Happy Birthday” to everyone who shares Abraham Lincoln’s Day!

For my first post, I must thank my Granddaughter, Lenora for setting up my blog.  I am sure I will be calling on her to help me use it!  True inter-generational love and sharing…though she is doing most of the sharing now. She is gifted in computer use and all things electronic including digital photography. I am a novice and very grateful for her expertise!

Today we hear the words from the demonstrators in Egypt, “Egypt is free!.” Words of jubilation. A non-violent movement toward a democratic society has succeeded. A miracle of human determination and discipline. We celebrate with them and support them in the hard political work that lies ahead. Hopefully this will contribute to the loosening of the grip of other oppressions in the region.

Belatedly I welcome in the Chinese New Year, the year of the rabbit. This is supposed to be a peaceful year, one in which we can appreciate life and take time to contemplate it.  Breathing deep after the challenging year of the tiger.

And close to home, as I look out of the window there is snow everywhere. I love seeing the shadows cast on the snow  by tree limbs lit by the sun. There is beauty and there is danger. Ordinary tasks are harder. Just getting out of the driveway is a challenge with six foot mounds of snow on each side and across the way. Mounds made by people shoveling, plowing, and snow blowing,  and chopping of ice.Walking is hard. There is a weariness in all of us now. We can and will cope. But, we are ready for spring.

Welcome to Patricia’s blog! We’re still under maintenance, but be sure to check back later for updates!